GROWING NEEDS

Don't think of it as "only a grow-op" that burned down.

Think of the humanity.

Remember that it was someone's livelihood that was destroyed.

It was more than that: it was a part of the lifeblood of a business
enterprise that has taken a vast army of miscreants off the streets,
putting them in back alleys and in children's playgrounds where they are
employed in a moderate-risk venture that would make entrepreneurs in most
other businesses in this country drool.

Most Canadian business owners feel beleaguered by red tape, untold nibbling
service charges, and taxes that are funnelled back seemingly for the sole
purpose of making more the red tape and designing still more service
charges and taxes.

Not these guys: government interference is precisely what has created the
growing business that fell victim to fire. By making it highly illegal, but
installing miniscule penalties, the federal government itself ensures
quality profit margins that far outweigh the risks.

In a sense, those people were living the Canadian dream - until it
disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Well, more than a puff, actually - puffs of smoke are an integral part of
their business, after all.

But now we're appealing to you to help get them back on their feet.

Their needs are modest.

Of course, they have to start with a place to set up shop. An old,
abandoned shed will do in a pinch - or maybe a corner of a mushroom barn
that you're not using at the moment.

Ideally, they'd like a nice home in a quiet subdivision. Don't worry about
the rent. And they'll take care of the renovations themselves.

Theirs is a low-overhead business, and they'd like to keep it that way. So
if you have any spare duct tape (the handyman's friend!), it sure would be
appreciated.

A pair of electrical pliers would be a bonus, and any rubber-soled shoes
you have kicking around would also come in handy.

It's probably too much to expect that someone would have the riggings for a
hydroponic greenhouse lying about, but if you can spare the odd halogen
grow light, it would be helpful - or even just a handful of fluorescent tubes.

I tell ya, these guys are resourceful. They'll use up anything they can get
out of you. Anything at all.

Oh. And they'll need seed stock, of course. Those seeds in the bottom of
your baggie are just the ticket - especially if they came from some buds
that gave you a particularly nasty buzz.

These folks won't be ungrateful. They'll give you the business, if you give
them half a chance.