A Stranger In The House, Part 6b

NONE OF US ARE PERFECT

But We Can Change Things

Not until her daughter, Serene Clinchy, died in a car crash Aug. 3, did her
mother realize how much substance abuse hurts Edmond youth.

"Some of her friends are confiding in me, and letting me know what is going
on," Charlene Walker told The Sun. "I feel like honestly, it's God
providing the information through the kids for me. He knows where my heart
is and he knows I want to see these kids turn to God."

Walker has created a Thursday night youth-based Christian prayer and Bible
study group at her house for teen-agers and their parents. It's led by
Pastor Bo Parrish of Daybreak Community Church in Edmond. Serene's Group is
a ministry dedicated to Clinchy.

Among friends, the teen-agers share the message that they don't have to
swallow pills or go to drunken field parties to enjoy life. The girls are
also invited to have slumber parties at Walker's home on Friday nights.

"I want to see a wonderful group of teens that are ready to change the way
things are -- to become bold for truth --to become bold for purity, love
and honesty," Walker said.

Her daughter was not intoxicated at the time of the crash, she said.

"Teachers are saying that. Some of the kids are saying (she was drunk) and
it's a complete lie," she said. "The toxicology report came back as
absolute zero in her system."

Clinchy was returning home with another friend, Rachel McGuire, in her 1992
Honda Accord when, heading northbound at 62 mph, she veered off a curved
portion of Interstate 35 near Britton Road.

She never regained control of her car, but crossed the median and was
struck by an oncoming tractor trailer.

She died instantly. McGuire suffered severe injuries.

Today, a white cross marks the site on the freeway.

Parents Have Opportunities

Her daughter's death is a lesson for teen-agers to honor their parents,
Walker said. Serene was instructed by her parents not to drive past
Memorial Road and Interstate 35 after 10 p.m. Serene had told her mother
she was going to a movie with her friend and two "boys" that they knew.
Walker gave her permission and set a midnight curfew.

"She didn't tell me the truth," Walker said. Instead, Clinchy drove to N.W.
30th and May Ave. in Oklahoma City where her friend's boyfriend lived.

"They went down there after they got beer illegally (in Edmond)," Walker said.

"I've heard now there was a party going on and Serene and her friend stayed
outside. They just hung out and didn't go in and then they drove back
because Serene was trying to meet her curfew.

"She stood for life. She stood for love. She loved her friends and wanted
everybody to be happy," Walker said.

"She loved God. She wasn't perfect. And I feel like that's what it's all
about -- none of us are perfect. You know we all make mistakes. But we can
change things. We can make a difference in this life."

Walker hopes her support group will be duplicated by other parents in the
Edmond.

Teen-agers push away their parents, so parents feel like they need to let
their teen-agers do "their own thing," she said.

Parents have an opportunity to demonstrate they care enough to spend a
couple hours a week attending the group, she added.

Spiritual Values

"Probably one of the greatest things that's happened this year is Thursday
nights," said a friend of Serene. "We go over to (Walker's) house. We all
eat pizza and we talk about God, hang out and it makes us feel closer to
Serene. It helps with the grieving process," Jaine Infelise said.

"When our other friends are going to parties and we don't want to be in
that situation, we just come over there and hang out. I would go to the
parties and I never drank or anything. I was always afraid of that. But
there's other kids who would go, and they'd drink or smoke or whatever. But
now it's holding them back because we have Charlene's to go to."

The 16-year-old's mother accompanies her to the support group. Jennifer
Infelise moved to Edmond because she wanted a healthier environment to
raise Jaine and her brother, Jeremy. But the same prohibited drugs are in
Edmond, Jaine said.

"It's just a bigger town. ... Nobody knows about it. It's like everything
is almost like a mystery. You never know what goes on unless you're inside
of it."

There's a myth in Edmond that not many young people are involved with
illicit drugs, Walker warned.

"I see a lot of people here wanting to go out and bust all these (field
parties). ...That's not really where I'm coming from," she said.

Her message is that spiritual values help prevent substance abuse.

Educating youth about alcohol and substance abuse is needed before
addiction becomes a problem.

Teen-agers need to be on alert for GHB, a popular drug at field parties,
said Nicole Reale, 27, who was a friend of Serene.

The clear liquid is known as "the date rape" drug, and causes extreme
intoxication, she tells her friends at the group.

Walker adds that the drug ecstasy is called "a happy drug." "It's a cute
drug with a happy face on it. But it's causing kids to go into seizures --
it's causing kids to die," she said.

Walker said she's learned from Oklahoma City police at a drug-abuse
awareness clinic that Thursday night is when some teen-agers are likely to
start binging with drugs. Drug-binging youth become so exhausted by the
following Tuesday, they increase their risk for suicide, she said.

'Say Yes To Love'

Walker said her daughter considered her friends to be not only those that
she knew, but also strangers she had never before met.

"I think (Serene) would be really proud of what I'm doing -- that I'm
trying to do what I can in a positive direction to help her friends and to
help everybody," Walker said.

"Say no to negative thoughts and words. Say no to drugs and say no to
alcohol. Say yes to being positive. Say yes to honor and say yes to love."