Posted On: | 2009-03-20 15:33:53 |
Kumiko represent the inner child that I am.
That part of me never had a chance to exist before last fall. Even when I was a child I wasn’t a child, I’ve never been a child....
Because when I was a kid I found the other kid to be just stupid prick and by acting indifferently, they reacted hardly, I was also a red hair...so very different; it was very hard for me to make contact with everything outside my home.
So during 10 years that part was severely beaten, humiliated mentally, emotionally and physically. Kumiko was traumatized by that, she was scared of human being, of their madness and jealousy....always suspicious, never giving total trust to anyone.
But that part was also a naive, gentle, soft and fragile, she just wanted to have fun and enjoy life. Just wanted to love and be loved.
So last fall I rediscovered that part and for the first time in about 25 years, she had a chance to express herself and enjoy life, have fun with party people that she meet.
That felt so good, so so good...
But then two week ago, ma best friend, the one I trusted enough to tell all this, betrayed me, oh he had before but not as hard as he did that time, b’cause that time he did exactly what the other child use to do when Kumiko was alive, he humiliated her, and savagely bitched her just right after she had done so mdma...you know that special powder that make you feel so sensitive.
So Kumiko felt the grief inside her heart and again just felt to die and go away from people she thought that loved her.
Kumiko today is dead again but that is just a image because Kumiko in Japanese mean the eternal child...
So I guess one day she will be back.
For right now Emyko has taken back her place.
Emyko in Japanese mean the one that is able to talk to ghost, she’s an old greedy bad bitch witches......she don’t give a damn fuck...she’s to busy doing her stuff.