2010 March:

2008 November:

2008 October:

2008 May:

2008 April:

2008 February:

2007 December:

2007 September:

2007 August:

2007 May:

2007 January:

2006 November:

2006 September:

2006 August:

2006 July:

I'm so sick and tired of trying to find happieness, only to fail at every turn.

The only thing that ever works out the way I'd like it to is nothing.

I feel so sub-human.
Unwanted.
Unappreciated
Unable to enjoy things that make people happy.
Unable to enjoy things that make me happy.

Every time I try and open myself up, I get a painful reminded of why I shut myself away.

The only people that ever make me happy never seem to want to.

I can't eat the food I love, I can't play out the way I want to, I can't make the music I love, I can't
hold on to anything worth holding on to. I can never make it to anything I reach out for, and
everything I get my hands on gets violently ripped from me when I need it the most.

I hate hope.

Every time I hope, I get let down.
Every time I hope, another part of me dies.