| Title: | broken hearts are for assholes |
| Posted On: | 2007-11-24 11:50:30 |
new city. new day.
i said goodbye to my friend. we hugged for a good five minutes, all the unsaid things passing between us. the "i´m sorry"s, the "it should have ended differently"s, the "i will miss you"s and the like. i close my eyes and take in the peppery lavender smell for the last time. i know it´s the last time. i had hoped to avoid saying goodbye, but he insisted on me waking up, so that i wouldn´t disappear from his life without notice, like i often disappeared from the house.
"can i ask you something, mija"
"sure cariño"
(what is he going to say to me? would you have stayed had things been different? would you have left regardless? will i ever see you again?)
"do you have any STDs?"
oh. em. gee.
the smile on his face breaks my heart, i know he´s just poking at me, so i tell him i´m full of aids, syphillis and hep c, and we laugh hysterically as he lights a joint, our last joint together, the last exchange our lips will have, or so i thought.
he hugs me again before running out the door, a kiss on the lips, grey green eyes plunged into eyes of icy blue, electricity passes and i remember a moment when i thought those eyes would pierce my soul if i looked in to them long enough. i know he feels it too, because i hear his voice break a bit, "Take care, mija, I hope you come back here, and remember this is your home."
Poof.
/end mau input time frame=forever?
i say my goodbyes to baja. goodbye white sand beaches and turquoise water, goodbye flying fish and pelicans. goodbye dirty streets and boring city, goodbye palapa where i slept at first.
i said my goodbyes to a man i could have loved, had things been different. as the ferry sails away from the baja where i just spent a month, i think of all the people, all the places, all the beaches, the desert, the ranches and palapas... and only one face stands out from the rest. i hear a rip in my chest, a tear falling from my eye. i wipe it away and hold my head high, for today is a new beginning
hello pacific ocean, hello mainland, hello new people, new adventures.
(but still. goodbye, mexican surfer. stay beautiful, porque lo sos, mucho, bombon.)
