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Child Dragged Back Into Burning House
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cactain_steef replied on Thu Aug 28, 2003 @ 8:45pm
cactain_steef
Coolness: 155380
Dover - Man's best friend made the ultimate sacrifice for Larry and Jen Randal yesterday, as the couple's cherished Retriever, Mrs. Cookie, leaped into a flaming building to ensure the demise of their obnoxious son. Four-year-old Billy Randal seemed about to escape a late-night blaze at the couple's suburban residence when the pet subdued the child and dragged him back to his death as the neighbors and parents he had tormented watched gratefully.
Mr. Randal said that the fire began accidentally when the vat of oily rags he stored in Billy's closet was ignited by one of the candles the family used for light. At the first sign of smoke, Mr. Randal quickly ushered his wife and Mrs. Cookie to safety, where they agreed that "maybe it was a good time to let the little guy catch up on his sleep."

The annoying toddler on the verge of life.
A tense silence fell on the gathering crowd when crashing debris woke Billy, and the child stumbled toward the door. As the family watched helplessly from the sidewalk, the boy struggled free of the burning debris, his tiny body silhouetted against blaze.
Tragedy was avoided only when Mrs. Cookie sprung from Larry Randal's arms to pull the staggering, annoying four-year-old back into the fire. According to firefighters' reports, the dog, "like some kind of Darth Lassie," was gnawing on Billy's charred flesh even as it was itself overcome by flames.
Witnesses described the boy's screams as typically obnoxious. "But actual death shut Billy's mouth like no beating ever could," his thankful mother said.
She continued, "Billy changed the life of everyone who knew him. I'll never forget it when he pulled my hair and called me a lesbian." Mr. Randal added, "He would call me that, too." Billy was especially close to Mrs. Cookie, said his parents, "He would grip her ears and try to ride Cookie down the stairs or sometimes trick her into licking the stove. It's that kind of thing that inspired her to do what she did."
Shortly after the fire was extinguished, the family gathered with relatives and a few close friends at a nearby nightclub to come to terms with Billy's death.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» nothingnopenope replied on Thu Aug 28, 2003 @ 8:59pm
nothingnopenope
Coolness: 201930
that sounds like something from "the onion" or the now defunct [ ]
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cactain_steef replied on Thu Aug 28, 2003 @ 9:34pm
cactain_steef
Coolness: 155380
au contraire! ahaha actualllly its from ... *dun dun dun!!!* the spark :O!
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» wisp replied on Thu Aug 28, 2003 @ 9:35pm
wisp
Coolness: 98025
That shit can't be true.

So, they basically ADMIT they killed their kid?
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» eLDee replied on Thu Aug 28, 2003 @ 9:38pm
eldee
Coolness: 121620
i don't get it

1st the dog is said to have saved the child and then killed it

i'm all mixed up
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» wisp replied on Thu Aug 28, 2003 @ 9:39pm
wisp
Coolness: 98025
and it was GNAWING on it while it was on fire?

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULLCACA
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cloud9ine replied on Fri Aug 29, 2003 @ 7:45am
cloud9ine
Coolness: 139425
the FIRST two sentences give it away that it's TOTAL B.S.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Fri Aug 29, 2003 @ 8:15am
screwhead
Coolness: 686295
You've never met my upstairs neighbor.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Fri Aug 29, 2003 @ 12:10pm
neoform
Coolness: 340370
jackie: really??

i thought lines like "Mrs. Cookie, leaped into a flaming building to ensure the demise of their obnoxious son" are found in all news reports.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cloud9ine replied on Sun Aug 31, 2003 @ 8:43pm
cloud9ine
Coolness: 139425
the second line.

i said the first TWO lines.

" Four-year-old Billy Randal seemed about to escape a late-night blaze at the couple's suburban residence when the pet subdued the child and dragged him back to his death as the neighbors and parents he had tormented watched gratefully. "
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Sun Aug 31, 2003 @ 11:05pm
neoform
Coolness: 340370
bah, it's american.. you never know..
Child Dragged Back Into Burning House
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