Jokes For Cutterhead
Good [+2]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Wed Aug 26, 2009 @ 10:36pm |
% cat "food in cans" cat: can't open food in cans % nice man woman No manual entry for woman. % rm God rm: God nonexistent % ar t God ar: God does not exist] % ar r God ar: creating God % "How would you rate George Bush's incompetence? Unmatched ". % [Where is Jimmy Hoffa? Missing ]. % ^How did the sex change operation go? ^ Modifier failed. % If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have? Too many ('s. % make love Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop. % sleep with me bad character % got a light? No match. % man: why did you get a divorce? man:: Too many arguments. % !:say, what is saccharine? Bad substitute. % %blow %blow: No such job. $ PATH=pretending!/usr/ucb/which sense no sense in pretending! | |
I'm feeling like a drama magnet right now.. |
Good [+2]Toggle ReplyLink» v.2-1 replied on Thu Aug 27, 2009 @ 1:22am |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Thu Aug 27, 2009 @ 1:42am |
Good [+2]Toggle ReplyLink» Rakoon replied on Thu Aug 27, 2009 @ 1:47am |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Thu Aug 27, 2009 @ 1:48am |
Good [+2]Toggle ReplyLink» flo replied on Thu Aug 27, 2009 @ 6:00am |
hahahah great jokes :)
remind me of this famous one: % alias sex "updatedb; locate; talk; date; cd; strip; look; touch; finger; unzip; uptime; gawk; head; apt-get install condom; mount; fsck; gasp; more; yes; yes; yes; more; umount; apt-get remove –purge condom; make clean; sleep" | |
I'm feeling phd powa !!! right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Sat Aug 29, 2009 @ 12:41pm |
an actual bug report
[ This is from a friend at Microsoft ] Bug # Status Title 5143 ACTIVE "Build done" signal makes no sound ---------- ACTIVE - 01/30/95 - MIKEBLAS -------------------- Visual C++ makes an audible signal when a build completes. When no developer is in the room, this signal doesn't make a sound. To reproduce: 1) Start a build. 2) Leave the room. 3) Note that the chime does not make a sound. We should find a way to make the build bell make a sound even if nobody is there to hear it. This philosophical issue may need program management's attention before being resolved. ---------- ASSIGNED to MATTHEWT - 01/30/95 - SCOTF --------- Can we use the telepathy support in Win95 to contact whomever is logged into the machine doing the build? Maybe we should just detect when the developer is leaving the room and prompt for a phone number where s/he can be reached. How about disabling leaving the room during a build? ---------- RESOLVED - BY DESIGN - 01/31/95 - MATTHEWT ------ ---------- ACTIVE - 02/01/95 - MARKLAM --------------------- Actually, we can't do this either. The problem is that while you're out of the room your build is neither finished nor unfinished. It stays in a state of flux until you return and collapse the quantum uncertainty by observing it. Perhaps we could link the build finished event to a cat in a box? ---------- ASSIGNED to HEISENBERG - 02/01/95 - MARKLAM ----- ---------- RESOLVED - NOT REPRO - 02/03/95 - HEISENBERG ---- I cannot repro this. I tried standing just outside my door and it made the beep. Do I have to go further from my office? Would the mailroom do? ---------- ACTIVE - 02/03/95 - MIKEBLAS -------------------- The relative position of the mailroom and your office are relatively uncertain to me, Doctor. Please try again: 1) start a build 2) leave your office 3) go down the hall 4) wait until you don't hear the beep 5) return to note that the build is done I think this is how I first repro'ed the problem, but I can't remember what I was doing to make it happen. The idea of disabling leaving the room might be the best possible solution, I think. When a build starts, the IDE should pop up a message that says "There are no more Fritos" or "The kitchen has closed early" or "The bathroom is being cleaned" so the developer will not be tempted to get up and wander around. With minimal rebuild in place, we should consider diversions that won't take as long to remedy: "You're expecting a phone call" or "Someone will stop by to see you soon". We need to think of messages that are easy to localize for VC++3.0J. ---------- ASSIGNED to MIKEBLAS - 02/13/95 - MARKLAM ------- To do this we'll need to avoid messages about the bathrooms and vending machines for external releases. Perhaps some customer research is needed to find out exactly *why* Visual C++ users leave their keyboards. Some suggestions (including MB_ types) Get a drink : (i) You're out of coffee (i) You're out of tea (i)(i) YYoouuvv''ee hhaadd eennoouugghh Get something to eat : (?) You have no food, remember /!\ You need to lose weight, fatso. Sit your ass down Exercise etc : (?) Did You Know - sunlight causes skin cancer (i) With a Nordik Trak you can get a workout in front of your monitor. Call for home delivery /!\ I didn't mean that about your weight See family : (i) They already know you love them /!\ They'll only want money for something /!\ Your in-laws have arrived Call of nature : This could be difficult. Consider supplying bed-pan or similar. ---------- ASSIGNED to MIKEBLAS - 02/13/95 - MARKLAM ------- ---------- ASSIGNED to MIKEBLAS - 02/16/95 - HEISENBERG ---- I attempted to repro this once more: I placed my machine in the forest at the edge of the campus. I started a 'rebuild all' and ran out of the forest towards my mailroom. My build normally takes 3 minutes. After 5 minutes I had not heard anything, so I returned to my machine. Unfortunately a tree had fallen on it. I had not heard that, either. | |
I'm feeling tarfu right now.. |
Good [+2]Toggle ReplyLink» DCRn replied on Sat Aug 29, 2009 @ 12:54pm |
Originally Posted By CUTTERHEAD
an actual bug report [ This is from a friend at Microsoft ] Bug # Status Title 5143 ACTIVE "Build done" signal makes no sound ---------- ACTIVE - 01/30/95 - MIKEBLAS -------------------- Visual C++ makes an audible signal when a build completes. When no developer is in the room, this signal doesn't make a sound. To reproduce: 1) Start a build. 2) Leave the room. 3) Note that the chime does not make a sound. We should find a way to make the build bell make a sound even if nobody is there to hear it. This philosophical issue may need program management's attention before being resolved. ---------- ASSIGNED to MATTHEWT - 01/30/95 - SCOTF --------- Can we use the telepathy support in Win95 to contact whomever is logged into the machine doing the build? Maybe we should just detect when the developer is leaving the room and prompt for a phone number where s/he can be reached. How about disabling leaving the room during a build? ---------- RESOLVED - BY DESIGN - 01/31/95 - MATTHEWT ------ ---------- ACTIVE - 02/01/95 - MARKLAM --------------------- Actually, we can't do this either. The problem is that while you're out of the room your build is neither finished nor unfinished. It stays in a state of flux until you return and collapse the quantum uncertainty by observing it. Perhaps we could link the build finished event to a cat in a box? ---------- ASSIGNED to HEISENBERG - 02/01/95 - MARKLAM ----- ---------- RESOLVED - NOT REPRO - 02/03/95 - HEISENBERG ---- I cannot repro this. I tried standing just outside my door and it made the beep. Do I have to go further from my office? Would the mailroom do? ---------- ACTIVE - 02/03/95 - MIKEBLAS -------------------- The relative position of the mailroom and your office are relatively uncertain to me, Doctor. Please try again: 1) start a build 2) leave your office 3) go down the hall 4) wait until you don't hear the beep 5) return to note that the build is done I think this is how I first repro'ed the problem, but I can't remember what I was doing to make it happen. The idea of disabling leaving the room might be the best possible solution, I think. When a build starts, the IDE should pop up a message that says "There are no more Fritos" or "The kitchen has closed early" or "The bathroom is being cleaned" so the developer will not be tempted to get up and wander around. With minimal rebuild in place, we should consider diversions that won't take as long to remedy: "You're expecting a phone call" or "Someone will stop by to see you soon". We need to think of messages that are easy to localize for VC++3.0J. ---------- ASSIGNED to MIKEBLAS - 02/13/95 - MARKLAM ------- To do this we'll need to avoid messages about the bathrooms and vending machines for external releases. Perhaps some customer research is needed to find out exactly *why* Visual C++ users leave their keyboards. Some suggestions (including MB_ types) Get a drink : (i) You're out of coffee (i) You're out of tea (i)(i) YYoouuvv''ee hhaadd eennoouugghh Get something to eat : (?) You have no food, remember /!\ You need to lose weight, fatso. Sit your ass down Exercise etc : (?) Did You Know - sunlight causes skin cancer (i) With a Nordik Trak you can get a workout in front of your monitor. Call for home delivery /!\ I didn't mean that about your weight See family : (i) They already know you love them /!\ They'll only want money for something /!\ Your in-laws have arrived Call of nature : This could be difficult. Consider supplying bed-pan or similar. ---------- ASSIGNED to MIKEBLAS - 02/13/95 - MARKLAM ------- ---------- ASSIGNED to MIKEBLAS - 02/16/95 - HEISENBERG ---- I attempted to repro this once more: I placed my machine in the forest at the edge of the campus. I started a 'rebuild all' and ran out of the forest towards my mailroom. My build normally takes 3 minutes. After 5 minutes I had not heard anything, so I returned to my machine. Unfortunately a tree had fallen on it. I had not heard that, either. Genius. Really. I want to see Schrödinger's build! | |
I'm feeling discordian right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Sun Aug 30, 2009 @ 1:19pm |
I'm feeling almighty right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Sun Aug 30, 2009 @ 1:37pm |
no , if thats your impression youre as dumb as when you call people idiots.
i laught at pictures , and i like to share them , are you that much of an analfag hater not to comprehend or you just unsecure about your own self and needs to bring down people around you for no reasons other than yourself ? you come in , point names / condescend at people out of the blue , you really wish you where the main man , hey ? dont turn this the other way , lets deal with you first . | |
I'm feeling tarfu right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Mon Aug 31, 2009 @ 4:50pm |
Half the pictures you post are from 4chan and you like to talk like you're some leet hacker or something. It's hilarious. | |
I'm feeling almighty right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Mon Aug 31, 2009 @ 8:20pm |
no you are the relentless asshole that keeps looking for fuss , go back under the rock you came back from , if you know whats best for you , until you learn how to play proper. freaking have to do your education too on maneurism ? grow up you idiotfag. Update » cutterhead wrote on Mon Aug 31, 2009 @ 8:27pm screwhead # nice -20 kill neoform && userdel neoform | |
I'm feeling tarfu right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Mon Aug 31, 2009 @ 8:29pm |
Hahahahaha, yeah, if anyone other than noah deleted my account they would lose their admin privs. | |
I'm feeling almighty right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Mon Aug 31, 2009 @ 8:30pm |
yeah lol it's not like we've got much actual power.. "bans" only keep a person from posting everywhere but Silly Games.. we can just lock/sticky/move threads and delete posts really.. | |
I'm feeling like a drama magnet right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Mon Aug 31, 2009 @ 8:30pm |
man , you need meds too, maybe join pierror in a trip to the psychoward :
from neofag profile Discussion Board History [ All 26284 ] 2009-08-31 16:50 Jokes for Cutterhead 2009-08-30 13:19 Jokes for Cutterhead 2009-08-14 14:00 Cutterhead's a Faaaaag 2009-08-11 22:10 Cutterhead's a Faaaaag 2009-08-11 16:48 Cutterhead's a Faaaaag 2009-07-20 08:26 N 2009-07-20 00:46 N 2009-06-06 15:58 ho-ly shitballs 2009-06-06 15:33 Woah Amazing 2009-06-04 22:12 Le Cupcake (army) so quit your fixiation on me , you make of yourself a fabulous fag afflicted with aspergers | |
I'm feeling tarfu right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Wed Sep 2, 2009 @ 10:29am |
>so quit your fixiation on me , you make of yourself a fabulous fag afflicted with aspergers
Only when you deretardify yourself will I stop harassing you. | |
I'm feeling almighty right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Wed Sep 2, 2009 @ 1:50pm |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Wed Sep 2, 2009 @ 10:59pm |
I never said I was harassing you.. get your facts straight fuckface. | |
I'm feeling almighty right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Thu Sep 3, 2009 @ 2:50am |
Originally Posted By NEOFORM
I stop harassing you. oh , thanks a lot | |
I'm feeling tarfu right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» ONE.LAB.RAT replied on Thu Sep 3, 2009 @ 7:53am |
Jokes For Cutterhead
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