Cows Of Economics. - Page 1

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Cows Of Economics.

Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» system_glitch replied on Sun Mar 22, 2009 @ 6:56pm


Coolness: 163425	SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbor. COMMUNISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk. FASCISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk. NAZISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you. BUREAUCRATISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away. TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. AN AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead. ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights toall seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull. A FRENCH CORPORATION You have two cows. You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows. A JAPANESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide. A GERMAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves. AN ITALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch. A RUSSIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka. A SWISS CORPORATION You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them. A CHINESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity. You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation. AN INDIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You worship them. A BRITISH CORPORATION You have two cows. Both are mad. AN IRAQI CORPORATION Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No-one believes you, so they bomb the sh1t out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least now you are a Democracy. AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive

	I'm feeling laundering karma right now..

Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Sun Mar 22, 2009 @ 6:57pm


Coolness: 686515	This has never been posted on this (or any other) message board or e-mailed to anyone on the internet ever since 1998.

	I'm feeling your norks right now..

Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» system_glitch replied on Sun Mar 22, 2009 @ 7:00pm


Coolness: 163425	Originally Posted By SCREWHEAD This has never been posted on this (or any other) message board or e-mailed to anyone on the internet ever since 1998. Never. Ever. .... still, I felt like dusting it off a bit.

	I'm feeling laundering karma right now..

Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Sun Mar 22, 2009 @ 7:19pm


Coolness: 686515	I feel the same way about my penis.

	I'm feeling your norks right now..

Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cutterhead replied on Sun Mar 22, 2009 @ 8:48pm


Coolness: 132520	my fortune cookie on unix setted to offensive pop me that one from time to time :) thou the last part added should be updated to the offensive cookie database . Update » cutterhead wrote on Sun Mar 22, 2009 @ 8:51pm rave wave should have its own fortune database submittedf by it users : /usr/games/fortune -o -drunken -kite LOL

	I'm feeling 4hz even if you dont right now..

Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» v.2-1 replied on Sun Mar 22, 2009 @ 9:11pm


Coolness: 160045	Originally Posted By SCREWHEAD I feel the same way about my penis. Sweet zombie Jesus. LOLZ (even though it ain't no laughing matter). Does this usually require rubber gloves, safety goggles, a Swiffer Wetjet broom, some Pledge, 2 Shamwows and an electric buffing machine ? And when you're done, do you proudly let it rest on the windowsill for all to admire ? >:-)

	I'm feeling like nico bellic right now..

Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Sun Mar 22, 2009 @ 9:22pm


Coolness: 686515	Originally Posted By V.2.0.MINUS.1 Sweet zombie Jesus. LOLZ (even though it ain't no laughing matter). Does this usually require rubber gloves, safety goggles, a Swiffer Wetjet broom, some Pledge, 2 Shamwows and an electric buffing machine ? And when you're done, do you proudly let it rest on the windowsill for all to admire ? >:-) yes.

	I'm feeling your norks right now..

Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» DynV replied on Mon Mar 23, 2009 @ 1:51am


Coolness: 109730	Originally Posted By STRANGEDAHLIA AN ITALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch. HHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHA ! XD Originally Posted By STRANGEDAHLIA AN IRAQI CORPORATION Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No-one believes you, so they bomb the sh1t out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least now you are a Democracy. hehe :)

	I'm feeling lucky that my countr right now..