God (not that I'm religious or something, it's just an expression)... it's been so long since I wrote something.. so long that I don't even remember what I wrote last. In fact, I write every day, but chatting doesn't really constitute writing. And writing for the sake of writing can be so much more fun! Regardless, I see myself turning on the amp and listening to some rep'ruh'zent.. just to get in the spirit you know? But only to find Alice Dee Jay playing in the background, and myself not getting in that oh so wonderfull dark-depressive mood that has worked wonders with my writing before. Might as well, I don't think I should depress anyone, seeing that I'm not much of that myself lately. Just sort of a balanced state of non-caring (read: apathy) and neutrality... which, in it's own, can be even more destructive than desperation or depression... since there's no real way you know you should feel... not happyness, not sadness.. just... plain, old boring nothingness.

And speaking of feeling, have you felt that wonderfull feeling of not-boredom (read: interest) lately? I haven't; in fact, I'm having trouble remembering what it feels like... In fact, I am lieing to you, I just watched the most wonderfull movie in black and white today, which actually made me, *gasp*, interested! It was about this bunch of unemployed British theater actors who decide to throw a non-profit play on Christmas Eve. And as cheezy as it sounds, it is very far from your tipical feel good Christmas movie. It might as well have been in the summer, since it has nothing to do with Christmas, just with how people react to each other when placed together in a place and with nowhere else to go. Anyway, I don't wish this to turn into a movie review, and I'm probably still overly excited about every little different thing I see, but if anyone cares, it was called A Mid Winter's Tale and it's from 1995.

I would like to sing the alcohol's song and dwell into it's misery and fall asleep with my shirt half tucked in and drooling on my semi-shaved jaw, but I don't have that luxury, and am driven up to a point where I'd rather write this this foolishness than rather get out of my chair and get me a glass of whiskey....
....
...ww...w...whis...keyy..... mmmmm....I'VE GOT IT!!
I will pour me a glass of Jack Daniels, which my daddy bought at the corner store, and visit some porn sites and not bring myself to bring-it-up since I'll be too interested in the little bubbles that I create by shaking the glass in front of my bedroom light! It sure sounds like a plan to me! :) oh.. oh... if only I had one of those single lights, that dangle on a single electric wire, that I could push, slightly, and it would dangle back and forth, back and forth, and give my room the allure of a cheap motel room!! WOW!! It would do wonders with the whiskey, and the stentch and the clothes that decorate the floor!! But then again, I don't have a light on a single electrical wire that I could dangle back and forth and back and forth. All I have is a bug infested double light (the bugs fly towards it and they burn themselves and their rotting carcasses stay there and look like little black dots on the bottom of the lamp).

Oh boy.. I've started writing about booze again haven't I? Ugh.. well I guess you write about what you like... so instead of sitting here and babbling, I might as well go and pour me that glass of whiskey, and see how the night picks up from there, other than that, I'm out! Cheers!