eltopo's Profile - Community Messages |
» eltopo replied on Wed Dec 17, 2003 @ 8:50am. Posted in What are you listening to right now?. |
crystal - new order |
» eltopo replied on Wed Dec 17, 2003 @ 8:46am. Posted in I Hate . . .. |
i might be an emotional vampire... i hate paxil |
» eltopo replied on Wed Dec 17, 2003 @ 8:39am. Posted in Crazy Fucking Day. |
oo oo i had the pleasure of colliding with a low slung door which opened in front of me with amazing agility and speed... those japanese cars the owners couldn't stop to see if i was ok cuz they were on their way to church... ahhh good folk my poor bike... but i fixed it, and i couldn't even feel my whole left side... shock can be cool |
» eltopo replied on Wed Dec 17, 2003 @ 8:28am. Posted in Banned. |
oh maaaan i wish i had the money to go skiing... or get a snowsuit n' shoes... n food... dang |
» eltopo replied on Wed Dec 17, 2003 @ 7:56am. Posted in The official ravewave bootycall thread !. |
if there's gnocchi's going down... may i join? they're better then fries! where's the booty? |
» eltopo replied on Tue Dec 16, 2003 @ 1:10pm. Posted in More Drugs. |
you're right heather i do feel jealous- i wish i could enjoy life like other people do i do feel alone- i s'pose i like the pain of seeing how little people care for me or like me but all this shit happens with or without drugs no one wants an addict in their lives trying meth is different for everyone i suppose... some people don't get hooked... i was the only one i know who did... i loved feeling good for once... having the illusion that i was accepted... actually trusting people for once... not being terrified of every experience... not painfully obsessing all the time... being productive... being FREE from my horrible behaviour it's different for everyone... i took it to relax and sleep, to digest food, to go to work and stop obsessing, to communicate, to have fun and feel good... and i was wrong as i've been told by everyone. i didn't know i was an addict when i tried it... i was just told i am a week or so ago. realizing what that means is really hard. but that's only me. that's my business and it should end- i wish i were dead |
» eltopo replied on Tue Dec 16, 2003 @ 12:45pm. Posted in Meth dealers. |
i was 19 when ___ dragged me into the bathroom at a party and told me to sniff as much from these 1.5 vials of K in one big line cuz i'll never want to do it again...(it was really finely shaved meth) i sniffed it all in one shot... the biggest tear i ever saw jumped from my eye and hit the wall the instant the corrosive crystals hit the lining of my nasal cavity, and my life was changed forever... which is just to say that i'm still impressionable having never grown up? age doesn't seem to matter quite so much as mentality/maturity ___ wasn't a methdealer then, but i hear he is now, back from the US... anyone wanna go hunting???? back then he just liked to fuck me over it was my choice to do it. i thought i didn't value my life and i gladly gave my life over to someone i was sure would kill it, because i would never be able to do the deed. |
» eltopo replied on Tue Dec 16, 2003 @ 11:38am. Posted in Thread. |
thrd |
» eltopo replied on Tue Dec 16, 2003 @ 11:36am. Posted in What your new year wish ???. |
i wish i were better... a good person |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 10:53pm. Posted in Electronik High II rollcall. |
i wanna be down |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 10:53pm. Posted in Snowball Fight 2003. |
lookit all that snnoooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 10:50pm. Posted in Things that please you!. |
talks with lee |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 10:49pm. Posted in What do you want today?. |
i wanna chill with gordo and ski and exercise |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 10:36pm. Posted in Banned. |
i was confused!!! so don't ban me... although i don't darken your doorsteps all the same... i'll be at blue dawg giving somekid some birthday beats if anyone wants some...oh i dunno |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 10:33pm. Posted in The official ravewave bootycall thread !. |
so who's makin me fries already? |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 8:12pm. Posted in Banned. |
dang i thought it made you cool... and what's this about household? i thought it was ravewave |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 7:46pm. Posted in The question of the day is.... |
i keep the peanut butter in the fridge so it doesn't separate |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 7:19pm. Posted in Banned. |
what do you mean banned? can i be? |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 7:11pm. Posted in Happy Birthday Charlie. |
i keep calling since saturday night and i never get thru :( hope you had a great bday charlie |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 2:40pm. Posted in Things that please you!. |
happy people i wish everyone could be happy... and healthy |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 2:37pm. Posted in What did you learn today?. |
how shall we punish kafwin? and i haven't lost a friend and i'm so happy to hear her voice again ...hey this time they're tears of... happy! |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 2:33pm. Posted in What made/ruined your day?. |
made: leelee calling:D made: sounds like kitkat had fun on her vacation... i hope it made her feel good and that she'll be happy to COME HOME TODAYYYYYY!!! made: the world looks beautiful for some reason... ruined: too tired to meet kitkat at the airport |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 2:29pm. Posted in What do you want today?. |
same here... i wish i had SOME money at all so i could show my appreciation to my family by giving them something... instead i have to look like an ass fucking $800 dept fuckfuckfuck wish it would disappear!!! and i really wanna lose weight too |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 2:25pm. Posted in What are you thinking about now?. |
hoping... |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 2:23pm. Posted in The Picture Thread.... |
you're beautiful caro |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 2:13pm. Posted in I Love . . .. |
when my friends want to live i love you leelee |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 12:35pm. Posted in i'm gonna get so fucking high tonight.... |
i got high on chocolate the other night i'm a caffiene addict:( |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 12:12pm. Posted in More Drugs. |
oh i've watched plenty of it, i've been offered many times, but i haven't taken any because i know i've already failed myself and everyone else... i am unworthy... of happiness, companionship and understanding i should stay away because it's not good for people to hang around an addict... but it's really hard missing your best friends... i hate being alone loneliness is what has driven me to do crack cocaine and heroin in the past and the more i stay away from people the harder it is to stay clean i should just die, but i'm not suicidal |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 12:00pm. Posted in The official ravewave bootycall thread !. |
somebody make me some fries - now!!! |
» eltopo replied on Mon Dec 15, 2003 @ 11:59am. Posted in the ravewave awards. |
somekid: those are some nice memories eh? too bad i wasn't on drugs at cloud 6 and didn't stay long... this sober thing is going on far too long come to think of it... thanks for talking to me at that party julian, despite how high you were and how fucked up i was emotionally... you helped a lot Liam gets the coolest party person in my books... he always goes the distance in whatever he does and is super supportive to all his friends - rock solid. and shut up simon :b you're the best and little sara definitly gets cutest girl |
» eltopo replied on Sun Dec 14, 2003 @ 2:14pm. Posted in The Dream Thrizzead. |
dreamt that simon and i climbed up a fire-escape to hang out on the roof and met up with three street kids there who told me my friend was oding and i screamed at them that wasn't cool and to fuck off and i ran away, dropping through the fire-escape past garbage cans and glass pipes and body parts... as if i were in a video game |
» eltopo replied on Sun Dec 14, 2003 @ 1:43pm. Posted in What is up with all these new RW people?. |
oh different definition.. i was wondering since what date of account created |
» eltopo replied on Sun Dec 14, 2003 @ 1:33pm. Posted in I missed Shooting Star II. |
FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKK how did i miss it? i miss CHARLIE!!!! happy birthday mang! i keep calling and it says try again later |
» eltopo replied on Sun Dec 14, 2003 @ 12:27pm. Posted in What are you listening to right now?. |
killabite |
» eltopo replied on Sun Dec 14, 2003 @ 3:16am. Posted in More Drugs. |
life is what you make of it... and if i'm bitching i deserve to be permanently shut up help me. |
» eltopo replied on Sun Dec 14, 2003 @ 3:08am. Posted in More Drugs. |
who you talkin to? i have the easiest, most blessed life... i'm just such a rotten person that i always fuck everything up |
» eltopo replied on Sun Dec 14, 2003 @ 3:04am. Posted in What is up with all these new RW people?. |
it was 8 i can't believe you forgot and what defines new and old? |
» eltopo replied on Sun Dec 14, 2003 @ 2:30am. Posted in More Drugs. |
i quit for two years after trying it for the first time. after those years were up i stopped having such severe shaking when thinking of the drug i tried it again, and have since quit i have not touched it for a few days shy of two months you don't have to do things more then once sometimes to know you are addicted. only substance wich ever affected me that way, but it happend all the same, and i assure you i knew only a few short hours after my first ample dose... just like my hunch i was addicted to joy after my first dose of that too... btw, do i look like i've been on it steadily for three years? thaaaaanks one thing is true tho... it's hard to quit friends however, i do realize the importance of my ostrasization from all friends and society as being an addict will only hurt them lemme tell you - fuckin hurts like nothing else from this end too but what do i know? i'm not even a person anymore... addicts aren't capable of feelings |
» eltopo replied on Sat Dec 13, 2003 @ 4:19pm. Posted in Things that piss you off. |
people who can't tell you the truth, or even what's going on |
» eltopo replied on Sat Dec 13, 2003 @ 4:10pm. Posted in The Picture Thread.... |
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